Stay Home & Listen To Records #3 Drinko de Mayo 2020 Edition

It Was A Beautiful Day

The Sky's Very Blue 

I Woke Up Early

Around 8 a.m. 

It Was Starting

To Feel Warm

After The Morning Stretches

& Banana

I Sipped My Tea

As I Strained To Listen To My Neighbors

Television

It's Almost Always Either 

The Smell Of Bacon

The Rustling Of The Pots n Pans

In The Sink

Or Them Chatting About

The Price Of Beer

Or Reliving A High School Memory

You Better Believe 

The Television Was On In The Background

Today Was One Of Those Obnoxious 

Morning Shows

That Normal People

Have On 

While They Go About Getting Ready

To Start Their Day

Todays Early Morning Program

Was Focused On Cinco de Mayo

& How To Celebrate It 

While Keeping A Reasonable Social Distance

When I Lost Interest 

Drinko de Mayo

I Thought To Myself

It Fell On Taco Tuesday This Year

The Year Of The Quarantine

& I Don't Miss

Seeing Mass Cases Of Modelo 

Stacked  6 Feet Tall

& On Sale

& A Bunch Of

I-Dont-Give-A-Fucks

Buying It All Up

Today I Saw People

Standing In Line 

Waiting For Their Turn At The Cashier

Face Covered Half Assed

With A Design Or Logo On It

Or Maybe Even A Funky Pattern

To Buy Beer & Some Chicken & Corn

To Throw On The Grill

Maybe A Pack Of Cigarettes

Cause 

Aint No Rona Virus Gonna Stop Me From Gettin'

Fuuuuuucked Up

Said The Dude Standing In The Next Line Over

Rockin' Dirty Socks With His Chanclas

Straight Outta Bootleg Chronicles ( the misplaced set list mix ) Part Two

Straight Outta Bootleg Chronicles ( the misplaced set list mix ) Part Two by Dj Creepy on Mixcloud

Straight Outta Bootleg Chronicles ( the misplaced set list mix ) Part One

I Stood In Line

Over Heard These Two 

Hipsters Ahead Of Me

Talking

Killing Time

As The Slow Ass

Cashier Who's Been

Slangin' Slurpies & Big Bites

Ever Since I Was A Kid

Rings Up The Person

In Front Of Them

One Sucks His Teeth

"sssth,Man I'm

Gonna Watch That Movie
Straight Outta Compton
On Bootleg
While I Drink My Tall Cans.!"
He Also Bought
A Sock It To Me Cakes Slice
& Some Grape Now n Laters

His Friend.?
Well She Bought
A Bag Of Flaming Hot
Cheetohs
Skittles
& A Pack Of
Sour Apple Wraps
She Encouraged His
Gangster-ness

Smiling & Nodding
Her Head
"yaaaassss"
Eyes Hidden Beneath
A Beanie That Was
Given To Her
By The C.E.O.
Of A Clothing Line Designer
Which Also Happens
To Be Her Little Brother

Who's Outside
in The Car
RIGHT MUTHA FUCKIN NOW.!
Texting His Mom
I Love You Mom
With Emoji's
Now That's gangsta

King Hipster Of The Night Time World

The music was just as musty as the place was
Of course you can hear it
But it was just background music
Everyone was plain sweaty,drunk & coked the fuck out

As I stood at the bar trying to get a drink
A couple of guys thought it to be smart & started
A little hipster mosh pit
The After Hour Hippie slash 80's New Wave chicks
Started yelling: Fuuck You.! You Fuuckin Assholes.!
And began pushing back

It was all over before it even started
The guys used the whole dilemma
To get closer to the bar & get some kind of attention from the ladies
And the ladies seem to have found
An Asshole to buy them drinks

Or was it the other way around
I cant quite remember
The lights had me disoriented
The music muffled out the sound around me
All's I know is there was alot of
Hollywood After Hour Hippie slash 80's New Wave shit going on
And some had MORE than others

Outside stood the scene
Either Texting,Bullshittin' or trying to be the coolest hipster
The World has ever known
In a lot of broken bottles & red plastic cups
And not one has a cigarette but everyone is smoking.!

Broke Out In Hives

Cause I had sex with someone in a car
So now I can't have sex in a car
So I shot her a text
That read:
I broke out in hives after we did it in the car
I must be allergic to you
She texts back
lol u r so funny

But I wasn't kidding
A Clinic Hospital Doctor
Who was in "between jobs"
Whatever the fuck that meant
Said
That when I break out in hives its cause
I'm around
Something I'm allergic too

He gave me two shots in the ass
Joked about my beard
& even suggested that I should
"Maybe Stop Smoking Cigarettes"

So I sent her another text
That read:
I'm serious
Now you owe me twenty seven dollars

She didn't reply

I hadn't seen
Or talked to her
In like two months
When one night in
Downtown L.A.
She tapped me on the shoulder
& as I was turning she said
"I thought You were allergic to me"
I replied
"I am but the police wont let me get a restraining order on you"

She laughed
& said
"You're So Funny"
& started to introduce me to her friends
Who all dressed like each other
& drank from the same
PBR Tall Can

I kinda smiled
& took the opportunity to
Excuse Myself
To go smoke some weed
Cause I was starting to feel
Itchy & Uncomfortable

Pon walking out
The DJ played
A song that was once obscure
When it dawned on me

I might just be allergic to Hipsters
& That My Clinic Hospital Doctor
Who was in "between jobs"
Might just be doing too much Oxycontin
Which could explain his
"in-between jobless"

Stoned,Drunk & R.E.M. Records | Video

Video streaming by Ustream


STONED,DRUNK & R.E.M RECORDS

I Remember
Looking Over A Man Made Lake
Somewhere In The Outskirts
Of
South West Miami
Trippin' On L.S.D.
When I Heard R.E.M.
Blarin' From
Some Chicks Busted Ass Honda Civic

I Had Listened To Them Before
But I'm Guessin' The Acid Had A Major
Influence
Embedding R.E.M.
In My Mind Forever

The Car Was Fucked Up But The Sound System Was Dope
Or Maybe I Was Too Doped Up To Realize The Car Wasn't Busted
    It Was Just That The Sound System Was Fucked Up

In Any Case
The Music Reminds Me
Of The South:
With All Its Open-ness
I Never Felt Cluttered
               Or Choked Out By A City.        
The Humidity
Even After It Rained
It Was Like Sitting Outside In A Sauna
              & All The Big Ass Bugs,
Raccoons,Possums & Reptiles
That You Just Dont See In Los Angeles
That Shit Was Craaaazy.!
But I Enjoyed It All.!
Hell It Was When I Walked In To
A Bar In Tampa,
Sat & Drank Beer
& Listened To This Cat
Spin Records
That Made Me Want To Become A DJ

So When I Moved Back To L.A.
& Started To DJ
I'd Find Myself
Like A Sad Professor
Going To The "Rock/Alternative" Sections
& Dig For R.E.M. Records
To Complete The Collection
On Vinyl.

Every Now & Then
I'll Pull Out The Records
Slap 'em On The Turntables
& Go Back To That Evening
Trippin' BALLS
& Wondering
What Happened
To My Fuckin' Shoes.

SONG LIST
1.We Walk
2.Gardening At Night
3.So.Central Rain
4.Catapult
5.(Dont Go Back To) Rockville
6.Feeling Gravity's Pull
7.Fall On Me
8.Cant Get There From Here
9.Me In Honey
10.There She Goes Again (Velvet Underground Cover)
11.What's The Frequency,Kenneth?
12.Monty Got A Raw Deal
13.Love Is All Around (The Troggs Cover)
14.Exhuming McCarthy
15.Imitation Of Life
16.Bang And Blame
17.Star 69
18.Cant Get There From Here [*Played Again]
19.These Days
20.Driver 8
21.I Believe